Under the Knife

Yesterday Broski went under the knife for a Septorhinoplasty, a surgical reconstruction of the nose, and a removal of all things obstructing the nasal cavities.
Having had his nose broken three times through the years, Broski's nasal cartilage was zig-zagged, making it unable for him to breath through his nostrils. The scientific name for the condition is called a deviated septum, which I think would make a great band name.

"And now, introducing, DEVIATED SEPTUM!!!" 

*Hard Rock Music Drones*

So if you can't breathe, the solution seems obvious- get it fixed, and repair the crooked nose in the process, right? But Broski was only half-baked about it. We asked him why.
All the while I sat there thinking how the word "rhino" found its way into Septorhinoplasty. ANYYWAY..
He was worried that his peers would think he was superficial, that he just fixed his nose because it was crooked or he didn't like the way he looked. On the other hand, if he did agree to the surgery, he would,
1. Be would be able to smell things (like my awesome cooking).

and

2. Improve at running (he's pretty good at that.)

As a matter of fact, Broski's top-notch running got him onto a college team, which introduced another dilemma: since this is the transitional summer between his high school and college years, wouldn't it be the perfect time to slightly alter his appearance? No one in his university would know what his nose looked like before the surgery. Then wouldn't even have to know about it. Then again, if he has been this successful at running so far, why change anything?

In the end, Broski decided that his condition was different than how he was created to look, so he agreed to do the procedure. Actually, he wouldn't really be "doing" anything. He would just lay unconscious while the surgeons in shower caps sliced open his face. No big deal.
We brought him to the hospital and they made him put on one of those sexy hospital gowns- which, if you think about it, are actually much thinner and medically inclined versions of the Snuggie. In my opinion, Snuggies and hospital gowns shared some sort of fabric womb, and the Snuggies were toootally the favorite child. Sad, really. Moving on, Broski's gown had a large hole in the breast pocket, "In case the baby was thirsty," he said.

He was a real trooper. Maybe a little too much of one.. apparently he woke up right after the surgery on the table and went Godzilla on some of the nurses. They said it was normal. But when we saw him in recovery, all he said in his delirium was, "I hope I didn't cause any trouble." Like really, he said it about ten times.

Broski's chillin on the couch as we speak. I'll post a picture update when he's not wrapped in gauze.

PS. I figured it out. "Rhino" means nose.

Happy healing!

Love,